Waiting to Forget
by rasberrypumpkin27
Summary: Once a short angst piece of Mai waiting and forgetting. Now a story about Mai learning to cope with her feelings towards Naru. A slow but an eventual relationship between Mai and Naru.
1. Chapter 1

**~"Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worst kind of suffering."~ Paulo Coelho**

She waited for the red and orange sea of flames to consume it. Waiting for the scorching fire to consume her home and all her belongings, the things that carried a lot of memories; wonderful and unpleasant ones.

It was causing her pain, watching, waiting for the flames to consume her haven, the place where she could breakdown without anyone judging her since she lived alone. Yes, living alone made her feel lonely at times, but there were days that being alone gave her relief. For instance, she was relieved to be alone the day that Naru, or rather, Oliver Davis rejected her.

The memory still hurt her like it was yesterday. It had been over a year since he had rejected her and left for England, but it still her hurt her very much.

The firemen attempted to get the petite brunette to talk to them, to make her answer them if she was injured, but she did not say a word, her gaze set on her burning home.

Watching her home burn made her want to forget everything and everyone at the current moment, but she realized that if she wanted to forget, it would mean that she had to accept reality.

Face the reality that she had lost her parents. Face the fact that the man she loved, rejected her and left for England, never indicating whether he would be back or not. Face the fact that the members of SPR, the ones she considered family, had their own lives to live and she didn't have to be included in their lives. They could leave her behind for all they cared. She also had to face the fact that she now was homeless.

Yes, attempting to forget just made reality much more bitter, yet, waiting was just as painful.

She knew she couldn't wait around for her parents to magically appear alive before her. Her parents were dead and there was no way to bring her parents back from the dead. She could wait around for Oliver to come back but that wasn't really an option. Yes she loved him, but she didn't want him to continue to define her life. She had already waited a year for him to come back and it became too painful for her, when she realized that he was probably never coming back.

When SPR dispersed, she waited around for everyone to contact her and it only hurt her because no one did with the exception of Yasu. Only after she actively contacted everyone, did her fear of losing any resemblance of a family lessen.

Waiting or forgetting, no matter which one, it entailed suffering and so Mai decided to end her suffering once and for all. She did not want to wait around anymore and she did not want to forget because both caused her misery.

 **~No idea if this is going anywhere…I just have to much coffee in my system and I'm not really feeling in the mood in typing something happy I guess…**

 **~Don't own Ghost Hunt or any of the characters**


	2. Chapter 2

***Nice to know that you guys found it interesting enough to follow, favorite and review. Thanks!**

 ***So I decided to continue this for a bit longer... it might develop into a story by the way this chapter turned out.**

* * *

She didn't know he was going to be there.

If she were to be honest with herself, she would have liked to seem him in different circumstances. Before, she used to like the fact that he would come to her rescue whenever she ended getting herself in trouble. However, that changed when he left.

After being away from him for a year, she learned to dislike the fact that he would always ended up saving her, making her seem like she couldn't do anything by herself. She loved and hated how much she would need him.

Waiting for him made her realize the painful truth, he was like a drug, a drug that she needed to get out of her system. Their playful banters and the rare moments where he treated her with kindness because of the possibility that he might have cared for her as more than an assistant were the high. But like all drugs, the high was only temporary.

Forgetting him also wasn't an option. Yes he truly broke her heart when he asked "Me or Gene." Yet, she still couldn't hate him, nor forget him, especially after he unintentionally helped her gain a new family. Though he hurt her a lot when he left, the pain she felt could have been worse if she had never met Ayako, Monk, Yasu, John and yes… even Masako. She at least was grateful that he had given her a new family.

* * *

It seemed like luck was not on her side, in fact, it seemed like the gods or spirits were mocking her.

After being taken to the hospital to see if she had any injuries, a police officer questioned her. He asked her about her parents. Mai replied that she was an orphan and that she was the only one that lived in the apartment. The officer offered an apology, to which Mai replied that it was okay. Then the officer asked her if she had anyone she could stay with so he could drop her off there.

Mai thought about it for a moment. She guessed that Ayako was still on her honeymoon with Monk if she wasn't at the hospital at the moment, so she couldn't stay with them. John was currently in Australia helping out some churches that had called him to help them out and Masako was busy filming for her show so she told him Yasu's address.

* * *

Yes, she didn't know he was going to be there. The police officer excused himself to take a call, promising Mai that he would take her to her friend's apartment as soon as he finished the call. Mai only nodded, not really wanting to talk more than necessary at the moment.

As soon as he left, a voice called out to her.

"Mai."

She knew that voice; no matter how many times she tried to erase him from her memory, he still haunted her. She turned around and sure enough, her ex-boss stood before her, dressed in black, just as she remembered him. It didn't seem like he changed too much, at least physically. Mai had no idea what to say to him. She had always expected to be very happy if she were ever to encounter him once again, but as she looked at him, she didn't really feel anything. It was like watching a movie that people would not stop talking about and then watching that said movie, only to think that the movie did not live to the expectations because in the end the movie was really disappointing. Maybe she didn't really feel anything when she saw him because she was tired from working all day. Or it could have been because she had just watched her home turn to ashes.

He was just as surprised as her, if not even more so. It didn't seem that she changed much, well her hair was slightly longer, but that was the only physical change that he could notice. He was slightly taken aback that she still hadn't addressed him and was wondering what she was doing in the hospital. He was going to ask her why she was at the hospital but Lin's appearance prevented him from doing so.

"Taniyama-san?" Lin asked, confused in seeing the young brunette in the hospital.

"Oh, hi Lin. Still refusing to call me Mai I see," Mai smiled weakly. Naru was a little upset that she addressed Lin and not him, but he didn't show it.

"What are you doing here _Mai_? If you don't mind me asking," replied Lin.

"It seems that you have forgotten that I attract a lot of danger," she reminded the tall man.

"We haven't forgotten Mai. Now if you don't mind answering the question," Naru responded.

Just as she was about to answer the question, the officer decided to come back.

"I'm sorry about that, but I can take you to your friend's apartment now if you'd like," the officer chimed in.

"Oh, yes thank-you," she replied.

"Mai if you need a ride home, Lin and I can drop you off," Naru suggested.

"No thanks Oliver, I already accepted the officer's offer and I'm sure you have other important things to attend to," Mai said. Both Lin and Naru were a both a bit shocked that she had addressed him by his real name instead of his nickname, but since they were so good at hiding their emotions, it didn't seem like they were shocked at all.

Mai desperately wanted to just go home and pretend that all of this was just a bad dream, but she knowing her bad luck, it was just impossible. To further add to Mai's bad luck, the police officer got another call. After the officer was done with his phone call, he apologized to Mai and told her that he had an emergency that he had to attend to and because of it; he could no longer drop her off. Mai told him that he understood and so she watched him walk away.

Lin and Naru overhead what had occurred and Naru once again offered her a ride home, but Mai still refused.

"Mai…" Naru started.

"No, I don't need your help," she snapped, which took Naru and Lin by surprise. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you, I'm just tired," she sighed. "I'm going to call a cab. I'm sorry again," she said as she turned her back on them, not even waiting for a reply.

Maybe if Naru had returned months earlier, she would have been ecstatic, but at the current moment all she could think about was sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

****So, I finally made up my mind...this is going to** **become a story. I wasn't so sure at first because I never really intended to do angst/romance type of story, then again I never planned on writing any stories in the first place.**

 **~The first set of lyrics apply to the dream and the second set apply to Mai…**

 ***Don't own the songs**

 **"Were you honest when you said**

 **"I could never leave your bed"**

 **Wake me up and let me know you're alive**

 **And will you fall in love again**

 **Is the scent slowly spreading**

 **I've been answering machines all night"**

 **(Pierce The Veil)**

 **"You know those days when you want to just choose**

 **To not get out of bed, you're lost in your head again"**

 **(Foster The People)**

* * *

 _He waited for her once again, hoping for once that she would come home early; that and to not come home smelling like cheap alcohol and cologne. He wasn't dumb. He knew where she would go and she knew that he knew._

 _It was such a cruel game that she played. Every time she came home, she would make up the excuse of having to attend a function for work, but they both knew that she would always be with_ _ **him**_ _._

 _Yes, the man knew, but he always chose to ignore it. He wanted to believe that she meant it when she said that she loved him_

 _The woman at first used to apologize for her late functions for work, but eventually the apologies became less and less frequent; that is, until the apologies stopped altogether._

 _It was well past midnight. Just five more minutes and she would be home. It was routine for him to wait for her, but this night he didn't think he could stay up any longer because he was too tired. He felt bad that he wasn't going to wait for her, but he figured she would understand, so he went to their bedroom. Worn out from the day, he just headed into the room, not bothering to turn on the lights. He withdrew the covers and climbed into bed._

 _Odd, the bed was wet. He started to touch the entire bed until his hand came across something solid. He quickly withdrew his hand as if he had touched fire._

 _He jumped out of bed and quickly turned on the lights._

 _That's when he screamed in agony, for there on his bed, laid his wife. She laid their lifeless; mouth hung open, eyes wide-open, surrounded in a pool of blood._

* * *

Mai woke up screaming, effectively waking Yasu in the process. He burst through the guest room door to see a Mai sitting on the bed, looking at bed covers, refusing to meet his gaze.

He slowly walked up to her and carefully sat on the bed. "A dream?" he asked. She only nodded. "Do you want to talk about it?" he further inquired.

"Maybe later, I just want to be alone right now," she replied, still not looking at her best friend.

"Okay. I'll make breakfast and maybe then we can talk," he said, not wanting to push her into talking.

She fell back into bed once more, pulling the bedcovers over her. She knew she was alone again when she heard the door close.

She felt his pain, literally and figuratively. It was one of those dreams where she felt everything that the person . Loneliness. Frustrated. She was drowning in all those emotions and it was overpowering her. It made her not want to get out of bed.

Mai could relate to the man figuratively because Naru broke her heart, claiming that she loved his brother. Not to mention that her heart also broke because she made a friend in Gene, only to lose him as well.

Mai was used to being alone. Yes, she had Yasu, Ayako and everyone else, but she still felt lonely at times. Though she was used to being alone, it didn't mean that on occasions it would still cause her fear. She would fear being left behind, to be by herself. It occurred to Mai that feelings of loneliness would always follow a person. Those feelings would always be there because at one point or another people might experience the fear of being alone forever.

Though she didn't as frustrated as the man in her dream, she still felt it. Ever since Oliver and Lin had left, Mai began to wonder if she would have ever developed her skills if she hadn't met them. There was point, during the time that Oliver was gone, that Mai wished she had never developed the skills she had. It was after a dream about a girl who would be constantly bullied in school. The girl experienced difficulties learning and everyone would make fun of her, even her parents were disappointed in her. It broke Mai's heart to see the girl suffer. Luckily for Mai, it was a dream were she just watched, not experienced. Still, it frustrated Mai that she couldn't do anything. She would watch and experience a lot of dreams, but since she stopped going on cases, she couldn't experience the relief of helping the spirits move on. It was the frustration of not being able to help the spirits move on that caused her to wish that she had never learned about her skills. Still, who knew if she would have learned about her skills at some point or another if she hadn't met Oliver. Maybe if she went on a case, she would feel less frustrated.

"I really don't want to get out of bed," she said to no one in particular since she was by herself. After snuggling deeper into the comfort of her bed, Mai soon fell into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

The sound of people talking was what woke Mai up. If Mai wasn't so hungry, she would have paid more attention to whom, the voices belonged to, as well as her appearance.

The door opened to reveal a stunned Mai. She froze once she saw who the voices belonged to.

"You are the first person we have—" Naru started, but couldn't continue once he saw the person Yasu had warned not to wake.

"Mai…" Naru began.

"Oliver," Mai said, confusion written on her face. She became even more confused when she heard her name being said by the person she least expected to say it.

"Mai," Gene smiled.

"Gene," she breathed. She felt like someone had knocked the breath out of her. She didn't know what to feel at the moment. She didn't know if she should be happy or mad. Happy that her friend was alive or mad at the fact that it took over a year to find out that her friend was alive.

Both brothers didn't miss the fact that Mai was dressed in a shirt and shorts that fit her a bit too big. Clearly she was dressed in Yasu's clothes, which didn't sit well with Naru.

"Well, now I feel left out," Yasu chirped. "Yasu," he said, clearly mocking how everyone at the moment could only call out each others names. "Now, you were saying Oliver?"

* * *

 **~Well, next chapter will start to explore Naru's feelings a bit...**

 **~Thanks for the reviews!**


	4. Chapter 4

**~Thanks for the reviews; they make my day. I'm glad you guys find it interesting so far.**

 **~DeathWillNotPrevail: Thanks! I'm glad you think so.**

 **~D C Joker HS: Your reviews are always so creative, I always love reading them.**

 ***Don't own the song**

I tried and tried to let you know

I love you but I'm letting go

It may not last but I don't know

(Maroon 5)

* * *

To say that he was shocked would be an understatement. He didn't expect to see her in the hospital yesterday, nor did he expect to see her in Yasushara's apartment today.

Seeing her again, stirred many emotions within him, though there were two feelings that were the strongest.

The first was jealousy. It made his blood boil to see Mai dressed in what he assumed was Yasuhara's clothes. However, it made no sense for him to be jealous because he and Mai were not anything. He was her ex-boss and she his ex-assistant, nothing more.

The second was confusion. He wondered what Mai was doing at the hospital and wondered why she was sleeping in Yasuhara's guestroom. He was also very confused in regards to her changed attitude.

He didn't know why she would revert to calling him by his real name. To him, it seemed like she was being childish. He assumed that she did it because maybe she was upset with him for telling her the truth, the fact that she had feelings for his brother.

"Noll," Gene said as he elbowed his brother to gain his attention.

Naru quickly recovered from losing himself in his thoughts. "As I was saying, you are the first person we have talked to about rejoining SPR. Lin and I were at the hospital where Matsuzaki works, however, the staff told us that she wouldn't be in for a couple of more days. We have yet to contact the others. So the reason why we are here is to ask you, well now that Mai is here as well, ask you both if you would like to rejoin SPR," Naru said.

Mai still stood in the doorway of the guestroom, still recovering from the fact that Gene was alive. Both acted like it was normal for Gene to be up and about and it irritated her. Yasu looked at Mai, as if asking for permission since he knew that Mai wasn't too fond of Naru at the moment. Mai smiled at Yasu, giving him permission, though Mai thought it wasn't necessary, yet she found it sweet that Yasu considered her feelings. As Mai made her way to the kitchen to find something to eat for breakfast, Yasu answered Naru.

"Well, I think I'll come back. School isn't too rough right now and the job I have right now isn't really much to my liking," Yasu replied.

"How about you Mai?" Gene asked. Mai was making her herself a cup of tea when Gene addressed her.

"Oh, so you aren't a ghost after all, " Mai said as she poured herself a cup of tea. She then grabbed herself a yogurt and a spoon, as well as her cup of tea and brought them to the table, where everyone was sitting.

"Mai, you have to understand...I was in a coma for a while…"

"Understand what? Did you barely wake up from your coma?" Mai asked, her tone harsh. Mai knew she was being a little cruel on Gene, but it really made her angry that he never told her who he was or the fact that she was barely finding out that he was alive.

"Well no but…"

"How long have you been awake?" she asked.

"About nine months," he replied sheepishly.

"Nine months?"

"Mai calm down. You are being unreasonable, Gene needed to recuperate," Naru added.

"I didn't say that he had to come back, a simple text message or phone call could have sufficed," she argued.

"You know that would not have been enough Mai," Naru added. Mai realized that he had a point. If anyone had told her that Gene was alive, she would have wanted to see him; a phone call or text message would not have been enough. Still, she wouldn't admit that he was right, at least not aloud, so she didn't say anything and took a sip of her tea.

He didn't know if she did it intentionally, but she was torturing him. He did not have one of Mai's teas for over a year and it tortured him. In his mind, no other tea could compare to Mai's tea.

So he watched Mai drink her tea, silently hoping that she would offer him a cup.

"So, Mai will you be coming back to SPR?" Gene asked, hopeful.

Mai didn't answer him right away because she was torn. She wanted to go back to work for SPR because she wanted to help other people, but she didn't know if she could handle being near Naru. She was still upset with him, not to mention that she was also upset with Gene.

"It's a simple question," Naru said as he rolled his eyes.

" _Noll,_ " Gene glared at his brother.

"It was you," Mai said as she finished the last of her tea. She knew he was referring to working back in SPR, but her mind was elsewhere and so she answered his other question, the question he asked over a year ago. She looked up at him and saw that she had shocked him. "You can choose to believe it or not, but it was always you."

Gene was confused and he made a note to ask Noll later. Yasu knew what Mai was referring to because Mai had told him what happened, but he made it seem like he had no clue what Mai was talking about.

"I tried to let you know that I cared about you, but you didn't want to believe it and that is not my problem. I was never going to answer your question, but I came to a realization. I realized that if I'm ever going to get over you, well then I would have to clear things and so now you have your answer. Your question really irritated me and now that I have made it clear, maybe I can finally get over my feelings for you. I'm not embarrassed to admit that I cared or rather, still care deeply about you. What I am embarrassed about is the fact that I waited so long to move on. Though it might take me long to get over you, especially if I work for you again, I'll find some way to do it," Mai said as she picked up her yogurt and spoon and headed towards the guestroom. "Oh I'm assuming you want your other answer now," Mai paused. "I guess I'll be seeing you soon," Mai added as she closed her door.

* * *

 ***I didn't like this chapter, I'll try to make the next one better.**


	5. Chapter 5

***Sadly another short one**

~Trust dies but mistrust blossoms~ (Sophocles)

* * *

 _She was absolutely breathtaking. He was a few feet away from her as she stood at the top of a hill, looking at the scenery. She wore a baby blue_ _Crochet-Back Baby doll dress with a pair of white sandals. A gentle breeze made her somewhat longer hair flow behind her and he watched as she slightly turned and his heart stopped as she smiled. He slowly made his way over to her, ready to take her in his arms but he froze in his tracks when he saw a brown haired guy walk up to her and kiss her. She smiled into the kiss and he wrapped his arms around her. His heart broke, that was supposed to be him. It was supposed to be him holding Mai in his arms._

 _Eventually they stopped kissing, which relived him, but the relief was only temporary because what he saw next completely left him breathless._

 _Slowly, Mai's hands grabbed the guy's hands and slowly lead them to her stomach. The man was stunned as his hands rested on her stomach. He looked at her stomach and then at her and his unasked question was answered as she gave him a smile that rivaled the brightness of the sun._

"Noll! Noll! Wake up," Gene said as he tried to wake his brother.

"Mai," was all he said as he sat up on the bed.

"Noll, it's okay, it was just a bad dream," Gene said as he tried to comfort his brother.

"Just leave Gene," Naru said as lied on the bed once more, feeling bad for telling his brother to leave but he really did want to be alone at the moment.

"But…"

"Please," Naru asked, a bit irritated.

Gene knew better than to stay around his brother if he had actually used the word please, so he left his brother.

Naru couldn't go back to sleep after the bad dream, as Gene called it. Naru would have more accurately described it as a nightmare, but it didn't really matter. In the end, it was something that Naru would hope to prevent from happening; now that he knew it was him that Mai was in love with, or more accurately _still_ in love with.

He honestly didn't mean to hurt her. Perhaps Mai was right, maybe he didn't want to believe that she was in love with him, after all no girl had ever had serious feelings for him.

Naru knew he could trust Mai, but he didn't really know if he could trust her feelings for him.

It was never him that girls liked; it was always his brother, 'the friendly one' they would always say. But it wasn't just the girls; it was also part of his adopted family, not including Martin or Luella. Martin and Luella's distant relatives or friends would always prefer Gene as well.

Gene was one of the people that you simply could not hate. Arguably, one could despise the fact that he was so likable, as if to say 'I hate how I can't hate him,' however, the fact still remained that it was very difficult to hate Gene. Him on the other hand, could be hated. Most of his adopted family members despised him. They had always considered him an arrogant boy. A person who thought he was better than most. Yes, Naru thought he was better than most, but he thought he had earned it since he worked hard for it. Yes he has had more advantages than most people, especially since he lived in a patriarchal society and had the financial help of Martin and Luella. Maybe he didn't work too much for everything but he always put an effort,even though it didn't seem like it at times and though sometimes he felt he didn't need to because he understood it most of the time on the first try. Yes he got labeled as the arrogant type because he believed he was good. How much confidence did it take to be considered arrogant? For the most part, Naru had a lot of confidence in being able to understand the study of parapsychology, yet many people took it the wrong way. So, Naru just decided to give them what they wanted and so he would often appear arrogant in front of his parent's friends or relatives because he knew that no matter what he said, he wouldn't be able to change their opinions about him.

Somehow, his 'family' and other people made it seem like he was simply arrogant and nothing more. With time, Naru learned that he simply couldn't trust people at their word or on their appearance.

Naru had tried to like his adopted parent's family for his family's sake, but he couldn't after finding out how they actually thought of him and his brother.

It was always the same thing. Their-so-called relatives would always praise them for being very smart and well accomplished, but that was to their faces. Behind their backs, they would always say they doubted they were really that smart, despite all their accomplishments. They would also always criticize their field of work behind their backs. It was always about appearances with them.

Even though they didn't hate Gene, they still didn't respect him, which was something that really angered Naru. All they thought of Gene was that he was a happy-go-lucky person that didn't seem to take anything serious. It didn't even matter that his hard work was recognized because it was all about appearances nowadays. No they didn't hate Gene, but they still thought Gene wasn't deserving of all the recognition for his hard work based on his personality. They thought everything was handed to him on a silver platter, which couldn't have been further from the truth.

It seemed that a person couldn't be too happy without being considered a carefree person, while a person couldn't be too serious without being considered an arrogant or snobby person. He didn't know which was worse, being considered an arrogant person or being considered a person that was given everything for free and who didn't take anything seriously.

Trusting people was always a risk, which was why Naru always had such a hard time trusting people and their true feelings or intentions, it was also probably the reason why he had a hard time believing Mai's feelings for him.

* * *

 **~I had the concept of this chapter for a while but I had such a difficult time writing this chapter and it didn't exactly come out the way I wanted it to, especially since its so short. Its really hard writing an angst story when you are so happy (reason why I'm happy-** **Foster the People concert+ Imagine Dragons concert+ seeing your hockey team win the Stanley Cup (trophy)=pure happiness).**

 **~ I meant to have some plot development in this chapter, but as you can tell it was pretty much all about feelings. Next chapter will have some plot development.**


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